Innocence VS Ignorance

I want to share an experience with you that I found incredibly disturbing. Two days ago I took my children to the grocery store with me to quickly pick up a few odds and ends. As I was browsing the dairy isle, I heard a young voice say,

“I won’t run off mom, cuz that man over there could steal and rape me huh?”

The mother replied, “Good girl. Yes that man could rape you couldn’t he? We don’t know who he is do we?”

I was absolutely shocked, baffled, speechless…

I tried to keep in mind that this woman was probably trying to keep her daughter safe and wanted her to know about the potential threats and damage others could do to her.

This girl didn’t look over 5 or 6 years old.

Unfortunately, in today’s world crime rates are rising, kids are experimenting with sex earlier, drugs are becoming more and more frequent in schools and neighborhoods, and the information on sexual predators is rising.

As parents, I feel that we do need to aware our children of all the dangers out there, but should such a young child know what rape is?

This is the part that I struggle with. Is there a difference anymore between ignorance and innocence?

I would like to keep my children as innocent as possible while they still have the chance to be, but I also want them aware of what goes on in this world. It’s becoming harder and harder with social media, what kids talk about in schools, what other parents are teaching their children and how those children relay it back to those other kids on the bus.

For example, my 6 year old came home from school and told me about hand jobs! Kindergarten age here people! I didn’t hear about things of that nature on the bus until I was at least in middle school.

I didn’t know what to do. He described what one was perfectly and told me that other kids said it felt so good and he couldn’t wait to try it.

I did only what I thought I could do at the moment and told him that it was inappropriate for children of his age to talk about things like that. He had to wait until he was older just like he would have to for alcohol. I asked him not to speak of it again and that he should worry about other things like how to ride his bike without training wheels or how he was going to make enough money to afford his new light saber.

I won’t lie, I went into my room and cried. I had just listened to my 6 year old talk about things of a sexual nature and how he couldn’t wait for it. Of course, he didn’t realize it was wrong. It’s just what all the other kids were talking about on the bus. My sadness turned to anger and I did end up calling the school telling them of the incident.

I guess my point being with this one, is that I struggle to find a way to keep my children aware without giving them information that is not necessary for young kids to know. It’s incredibly frustrating to have to explain things to your children that they should not know about!

My kids know that not all strangers are nice, that running off could result in being taken by someone that isn’t family, or for instance, that accidents could happen if they don’t listen and obey their parent’s instruction. But I myself, feel it’s wrong to tell them that people could take them and rape, abuse, or kill them. To a child, that should be traumatizing, and honestly it isn’t something I feel little ones should know about.

I feel that children should be made aware of the wonders and beauty of this earth just as much, if not more, than the dangers.